changing things up a bit

Ah as college apps begin to pile on, I'm going to have to put my weekly posts on hold. I'll continue to post about major events and such but yeahh.

This is kind of just a ramble but also a small congrats to myself.

I got my first college acceptance!

PENNSTATE BABY :D

No, it isn't an ivy league school, it's not a UC that everyone at my school would know about but it's for me. It's a large school, relatively academic, relatively social, a mix of old school (what you think of when you think of university) and modern, the food is amazing, and it is a Division I school. They have an amazing Electrical Engineering program and just...I'm in love.

While I'm ECSTATIC about PennState, I can't accept their offer right now. Yes I turned in my application on the FIRST day it came out and got my reply a mere 3 weeks later and am in love with the school, but I love my friends and Dylan so much more that I feel obliged to apply to the UCs and CSUs. So those and other apps have been occupying my time recently. For those who are curious, this is my finalized college list:

UCs

1. Berkeley

2. San Diego

3. Davis (yes for you Julia haha)

4. Santa Barbara

CSUs

5. San Diego

6. Long Beach

7. CalPoly SLO

8. San Jose

Others

9. PennState (:

10. Drexel University

11. University of Illinois @ Urbana-Champaign

12. Michigan State University

13. Ohio State University

14. Ohio University

15. Oregon State University

16. Virginia Tech

17. University of Washington

Also, this past Thursday was my 17th birthday, yes I'm a youngin haha. It was an amazing WEEK (: from Thursday to Sunday but I'll do a separate post on that later.

a little taste of the fun (:

So what else has happened? I dyed my hair haha. It is now a dark brown, both for my boat character, fall/winter, and for my upcoming college interviews.

Speaking of boat...

I'm so glad I thought of Rinoa/Squall a month ago as many people seem to scramble and panic now to try and figure out costumes...

I'm still waiting for Rinoa's ring to come in the mail, to borrow boots from my friend Nancy tomorrow (haha I only have gray, and Rinoa's are black), and for Dylan's amazing grandma to finish making my sweater/duster thing. But this is what I have so far:

haha awkward pose...

trying and failing to look angelic since Rinoa is an "angel"

Oh speaking of Dylan, one last thing. I recently realized how much I've grown and changed in the past few years. Some people look at Dylan and I and call me naive for loving him so much but I see it as being mature. Argue all you want but I think it was naive of me to think that there was no such thing as love in the past. I believed that yes, I'd get married one day, yes I'd love my husband and such but I didn't know that real love felt like this. I can't describe it but it's different.

I look around and see other couples who just haven't reached this level/are not meant to ever reach this level and feel bad for them because they judge me and think I'm childish but really, it's them that are childish.

I don't believe in making a relationship work. You can't learn to love someone, you can't change to be loved, you can't build a relationship. If it is true love, then it will build itself, you won't have to change because you'll be loved for who you are, you won't learn to love because you already do. This may have made no sense at all, but bottom line is, you can call me naive or childish but really it's you that hasn't learned what mature love is.

this is it.